Well today is Wednesday, I suppose that's a good enough place to start. The boyfriend redeemed himself indeed, and is forgiven. After all, we all make mistakes. We ended up going to see Fright Night at the Grand Theatre downtown and it was a pretty awesome movie. After that we found our way to Red Mango, and had ourselves a delicious treat! He surprised me with tickets for him and I to attend the first Husker game together, and I told him he had to buy me a hot dog. I don't really like hot dogs that much though.. so maybe not. He's a great guy, sometimes I don't give him enough credit, but honestly I couldn't ask for anything better. I'm not the perfect girlfriend either, and we like to call each other on our BS so I guess that's better than what a lot of couples have. Like I said he redeemed himself, and is back in my good graces!
So I titled today's entry "Somewhere I belong.." because I feel like such a loner here. I've never really had problems making friends. I'm outgoing, and I like to think I'm approachable and friendly, so why have I barely made any new friends? It's emotionally exhausting. I can't think of much else. The boyfriend keeps great company, but sometimes a girl just needs a girlfriend. I miss my best friend so much, she lives in Omaha so I don't see her that often considering I'm poor and hate paying for gas. Back to the point, I'm lonely. Not in the 'I don't have anyone' way, but more in the 'why doesn't anyone want to be my friend' way. Man, this sounds ridiculously pathetic. I'm not this pathetic, I SWEAR. Maybe I've lost all my confidence, and I don't know how to get it back. As of now that seems like the simplest explanation to all my questions.
On a brighter side I have a Cinema 16 meeting tonight! My first one! I don't know too much about it yet, but I can tell you that it is a club that puts on film festivals and such. Maybe there is where I'll make some friends, but I'm not crossing my fingers. More information on Cinema 16 will come soon I'm sure. Also tonight, my dorm floor is having a game night. I plan on going with my roommate, but who knows if that plan will fall through or not. Even if it doesn't, I wonder what my floor is like.. No one really goes out of their way to talk to each other, so I have no idea who any of these people are. Except for the sorority girls I met during rush week who really didn't make the greatest impression. So we'll see. Jeeze Louise I sound so pessimistic, I'm not usually like this.. Things will be better soon though, I have to believe that, it's all I have.
And I'm still fucking sick. This blows so much. I woke up this morning with a sore throat and my eyes matted shut. Let me tell ya, no fun at all. I've been taking medicine up the wazoo (not literally) and sleeping quite a bit, so why am I not better yet? And when are things going to get better in general? I'm trying to be patient, but all this negative energy can really wear a girls spirit down.. Hopefully my next post is a little more positive and happy. For now this is my life, like it or not.
Carpe Diem!
